I started at Lane Bryant Outlet in the month of July, it was now March. I was hired on as an Assistant Manager. My store manager Sherry, and I had always got along great. We worked and played together, too. Sherry was 42, I was 21. She taught me alot about the inside scoop of retail management. Our team was very small, something I wasn't so used to coming from working before that in the Seattle area. You knew everyone and all their business. When I shared the news I was expecting, I received the run of the mill old people questions. Do you want boy or girl? Will you move to a new house? Are you excited? Wait are you even married yet? I never knew people could be so damn nosey. But it made me think about all the answers, What was I going to do? Nick and I had been engaged for a year at this point. I had spent that whole year self planning my wedding. The dress, the flowers, the place, the cake, it was all clipped and in my wedding planner ready to go. I don't however suggest planning a wedding while pregnant to anyone. It added so much more stress than I needed. Sherry has only been married, and later divorced once. She never had any children of her own. She was only ever pregnant for about a half a second. Frankly, she had no idea what I was experiencing. She assumed and she assumed alot that I could keep normal speed. I couldn't. I could barely get out of bed most days. I was so tired.
I recall one tough day when I had opened the store, I got there at 9 am. The closing manager was supposed to be there at 1. It was now 3 pm and I was flying the show solo. My feet hurt, I needed to eat and I was starting to lose my cool with the customers. I called Sherry, and explained what was going on and in typical Sherry fashion, she told me suck it up. It was her day off. I ended up closing the store at 9 and leaving at 930. I was pregnant for Heaven Sakes! She could of careless. I was so mad, hurt and upset. I'm pretty such my blood was boiling. To top it off, I had to open the store again at 9 am. I wanted to quit. If it was any other employee I could understand making them stay, but me, seriously come on.
Sherry and the Lane Bryant ladies and myself went through many stressful days at that store. I did however learn alot of good birthing information from the crazy mom, to, mom-to-be stories that everyone so desperately needed to share with me. Why is it that because your showing a little bump woman feel they can tell you all the gnarly details? Do they forget the hormone ratio while being pregnant? I think so.
Needless to say those last few months were tough.
Wednesday, March 9, 2011
Is this really what its like?
Feburary
The first 3 months of the pregnancy were like a cake walk compared to what was about to come. I was tired and cranky, but no morning sickness. I was a little bummed when I wasn't having strange food cravings. I always thought that would be the fun part, eating weird stuff whenever you wanted. No late night runs to the store, no making Nick run to fast food places, what was the fun in this if I didn't get to have some crazy food. I did have a particular liking to Jimmy Dean crossiant breakfast sandwiches, just never at 2am.
The smell of some foods can send a girl out the door so darn fast. I remember on one of the many nights we spent at my parents house for dinner, my Mom made cheeseburger mac hamburger helper. I almost vomited on the table. Its been 2 years and I still can not stand the smell of any kind of hamburger helper.
Around mid-Feburary we scheduled our first major appointment with the doctor. Nick took the day off work, we were going to hear the hearbeat of our little baby. Being pregnant causes this horrible thing called, Preggy Brain. I knew what time the appointment was, and I had for weeks. We get to the office and the bitch of a receptionist begins to tell me how I am 10 minutes late and they need to reschedule. I cried. Right there, Full blown temper tantrum. It was a big day to me. It somehow was supposed to signifiy that Yes, I really did have another human being inside of me. Never have I been overcome by emotion in such a way like that. Everything that day, Friday Feburary 13, yes I rememebr the exact date, went so terribly wrong for me. I don't think I had ever cried so much as I had on that day. Feeling emotional and therefore powerless to the extent of the emotion, is something I hated. I felt controlled by what seemed to be some outside or for that matter inside, force.
The next Monday I changed doctors. Doctor Kort was one only obgyn approved on my insurance, and his wife was the only midwife. She couldn't get me in to be seen, so it was a quick and easy choice. I remember laying there feeling huge, though I had only actually lost 10 pounds at this point not even gained any, and when the Doc came in I knew he was going to get me through that process. I felt comfortable with him and knew I had made the right decision to change doctors. We heard Joey's heartbeat for the first time. I cried only a little after leaving the office. That day sealed in the future. There was no going back from here.
The first 3 months of the pregnancy were like a cake walk compared to what was about to come. I was tired and cranky, but no morning sickness. I was a little bummed when I wasn't having strange food cravings. I always thought that would be the fun part, eating weird stuff whenever you wanted. No late night runs to the store, no making Nick run to fast food places, what was the fun in this if I didn't get to have some crazy food. I did have a particular liking to Jimmy Dean crossiant breakfast sandwiches, just never at 2am.
The smell of some foods can send a girl out the door so darn fast. I remember on one of the many nights we spent at my parents house for dinner, my Mom made cheeseburger mac hamburger helper. I almost vomited on the table. Its been 2 years and I still can not stand the smell of any kind of hamburger helper.
Around mid-Feburary we scheduled our first major appointment with the doctor. Nick took the day off work, we were going to hear the hearbeat of our little baby. Being pregnant causes this horrible thing called, Preggy Brain. I knew what time the appointment was, and I had for weeks. We get to the office and the bitch of a receptionist begins to tell me how I am 10 minutes late and they need to reschedule. I cried. Right there, Full blown temper tantrum. It was a big day to me. It somehow was supposed to signifiy that Yes, I really did have another human being inside of me. Never have I been overcome by emotion in such a way like that. Everything that day, Friday Feburary 13, yes I rememebr the exact date, went so terribly wrong for me. I don't think I had ever cried so much as I had on that day. Feeling emotional and therefore powerless to the extent of the emotion, is something I hated. I felt controlled by what seemed to be some outside or for that matter inside, force.
The next Monday I changed doctors. Doctor Kort was one only obgyn approved on my insurance, and his wife was the only midwife. She couldn't get me in to be seen, so it was a quick and easy choice. I remember laying there feeling huge, though I had only actually lost 10 pounds at this point not even gained any, and when the Doc came in I knew he was going to get me through that process. I felt comfortable with him and knew I had made the right decision to change doctors. We heard Joey's heartbeat for the first time. I cried only a little after leaving the office. That day sealed in the future. There was no going back from here.
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